My parents – my story

My Dad died Feb 14 1994. My Mom died December 15, 2016.

Their deaths had great impacts on me in many different ways.

When my Dad died I was aware that my Mom had taken care of him for a year while he journeyed through life to death by mesothelioma. I knew she was under tremendous stress and he and I had many conversations by phone discussing life, death, philosophy, religion, medicine and family.  I had far more conversations with him during that year than I had with my Mom. My experience with my father and his death was very spiritual and uplifting… Thanks Dad!

I was always closer in soul to my Dad than I was to my Mom. I could talk to him about anything and everything. He was insatiably curious, and I think I inherited that from him to a degree.  My Mom never really seemed all that curious – more like she came with a plan and was sticking to it – so don’t get in her way! She waited for me to get there… Thanks Mom!

My mother-in-law died October 21, 2018, I was her primary care giver for the last year of her life and that opportunity was life and hopefully death changing. Thanks Lillian!

In a nutshell here are a few things about living and dying that I find to be some of the ultimate universal truths.

  1. I think the Buddhists are right – there are 3000 worlds in a momentary state of existence.
  2. I AM never changes, ages or goes away.
  3. The total lack of information on what happens next makes fact checking impossible.
  4. Water and movement are critical for survival.
  5. Life is short – enjoy what there is to enjoy! I m removing the rest of the lines of that:
    and suffer what there is to suffer. You are blessed if you know and understand the difference.
    Reason for deletion: A conversation with my son Randy who pointed out that it is even better to NOT suffer what there is to suffer!
  6. Time is like elastic –  it stretches, it binds, it can send things flying, it can hold things up, and when it’s gone – it cannot be brought back.
  7. The person dying grieves the loss of their own life experience.

I put this blog up for VM because she is such a phenomenal writer and we have been discussing life and death for the past  3  decades and probably a few lifetimes prior to that.